Maternity Series |29 Weeks|

Woah, talk about late! I took these shots at least 2 weeks ago but forgot to post them on my blog here (you can see them on my photography blog, along with an explanation for the 'raciness' you see here, haha).

Too tired to post much else, I'll try to be back with a point form update on us all and our crazy busy lives, but I can't promise that packing, working, tending to a needy baby, and growing another needy fetus won't take place first. Perhaps in the dead of winter when things slow down I'll be able to take a breath, but for right now, it's just go go go. I have to tell myself Dorie's old motto "Just keep swimming, just keep swimming, just keep swimming..."

Have a good one!

G.

House Update

I said I would be back to update you all on the house, so here I am, and I'm VERY happy to say that everything worked out and WE GOT IT!

The last 2 weeks were very hectic for me, getting all of the conditions met, finding insurance quotes, going to inspections, paying appraisers, finding lawyers, and a bunch of other things I had to do to line up our mortgage and 'close the deal'. It was stressful (and pricey), but it's done now so all we have left to do is prove our downpayment to the mortgage folks and get our insurance lined up before we move on August 22nd.

The inspection went well, all of the majors were old but ok, the only thing we weren't really expecting was some (well, a lot) electrical issues, so that was a bit stressful, we had electricians in telling us different things, but in the end we managed to get a bit off the price of the house to bring it up to code, so that's good at least. Plus we got some extra money from the mortgage folks to do a few repairs that we felt were necessary (gutters to draw water away from the basement, replacing the pump that's outside in the shed, and adding a railing to the staircase). Those repairs, plus getting the house ready for winter (and a garden patch ready for next summer), will probably be the only things we'll do for the rest of this year, but we have our whole lives to work on it, so we don't need to be in a rush. The inspection report is really useful, we're going to use it as our 'long term to do list', checking off things here and there as we get them done (trust me, there's A LOT to do).  But it doesn't matter, the important thing is that's it's OURS.

So yeah, 6 weeks 'til we move again, which means we're back to having boxes everywhere and I'm packing up what we don't use on a daily basis. I'm also purging as much as possible, I really don't want to bring anything into the house that I don't either love or find useful...old sentiments and gifts included. This is our fresh start, I want to make it our home and not just a place where we keep our stuff, so only having what I want in there will be very important.  Many trips to the Salvation Army drop-off are planned :)

I think that's everything, I'll be taking LOTS of pics of before and afters, and our progress as we head down this journey of home ownership.  I can't wait :)

G.

PS-The layout above is my first attempt at digi scrapping, yay! I got the template for free from Cathy Zielkse over at Bits and Pieces...she's a cool lady, that one, I'll be using the template again very soon!

Maternity Series |26 Weeks|

Two words for this week: Leg cramps. I had completely forgotten about them from my last pregnancy but in the past couple of weeks they have come back with a vengeance! Terrible Charley Horses that almost bring tears to my eyes, usually first thing in the morning, waking me up and leaving my legs sore for the rest of the day.  Yes, 26 Weeks in my mind has been defined by Leg cramps.

(Shots taken at the old abandoned mall near my house, also where I took my 16 Week shots...it has come quite in handy as a play area for Victor and as a photo backdrop for me! You can see my new hair a bit in these shots as well, though it's definitely not 'styled' as well as it could be, tisk tisk. I suck at hairstyling and personal grooming, what can I say?!) 

I love my little helper :)

Be back later this week to let you know how all this house stuff is going, we're sooo close I can taste it!

Until then,

G. 

Maternity Series |24 Weeks|

Oops, falling a bit behind in posting these (at least I'm taking them!) These shots were taken when I was out location scouting for this maternity shoot I did the following evening. I find it funny that the client and I both wore a similar pink shirt, I guess it's a popular colour (and it popped against the background, so it works!) I'm not sure if there's much of a difference in my size from week to week, I mean there must be, but looking at the pictures sometimes it doesn't seem like that much...but he/she's growing, I know that for sure!

There were several tractors and cars going down the road as I was taking these, and I always made sure to look busy 'adjusting' my camera settings until they were gone...I don't think I'll ever get used to taking self portraits in public.  Hence the far out locations, they tend to offer some privacy.

Back in a bit with Week 26.

Until then,
G.

Currently...

editing...photos of two cute little boys; determined not to fall behind

eating...crab salad sandwiches on whole wheat toast

enjoying...my new hair cut and colour (but still getting used to it)

thinking...about the house

dreaming...about decorating the house

wishing...that someone could style my hair, paint my nails and do my make-up everyday

listening to...a random 'indie mix' I made on Grooveshark (Mumford & Sons, Bon Iver, Death Cab, etc)

drinking...water, and can't get enough

remembering...what it's like to have pulled groin muscles while pregnant (I forgot all about it!)

wanting...some fun alone time/date night with Dan

wearing...black leggings and a shirt/dress type thing (running out of wardrobe options)

thankful for...my parents, our real estate agent and our mortgage broker, who are all making this home-owning thing become a reality for us

struggling with...choosing a name for this baby

marveling at...Victor and his ever growing abilities and comprehension

frustrated with...Victor and his ever growing tantrums/picky eating

knowing...I should paint the nails on my other hand

giddy over...my fancy new 27" computer monitor (it's like a little TV!)

debating...whether to skip work this afternoon and head out into the sun

deciding...yes, I think I will

Happy Monday!

G.

Quick House Update

So if you're following me on Facebook or Twitter you may have seen me mention a few things about a house...if you don't, I thought I'd quickly update you on what's going on. It's been exciting and stressful at the same time!

About a month ago we went to the bank to see if we could get a mortgage on our own, with help from my parents, since we had settled on a house (the one above, mentioned in this post here). At first it looked pretty promising, but we then found out that we couldn't get enough because my income couldn't be counted and our debt to income ratios didn't work out. So we were pretty bummed for awhile, and even debated buying a mini-home instead, but then decided to try with a mortgage broker, just to see if our odds were better that way. Well it went really well with the broker, and with a few minor adjustments (Dan is applying alone, so technically I'm not on the mortgage), we were able to get pre-approved for the house we wanted, yay!

So a couple of days ago we put in an offer and yesterday we settled on a price (with some perks, like them leaving behind all the appliances, including a deep freeze and dishwasher, woohoo!). We signed the papers, and now we're in the process of waiting for the lenders to actually approve us for the sale price (and maybe a bit more for some repairs). Once that's done we need to get the house inspected (a very important step since we need to know if there are any major issues in this old house besides the ones we already know about), do the water test, line up some insurance, and if everything is ok, then we can close!

We have until July 8th to meet all the conditions (what I just said above); that kind of stresses me out since I'll be the one doing most of the arranging and logistical stuff, but our real estate agent is really good so he'll be helping me out every step of the way. The closing date isn't until August 22nd, but I wish it could be sooner, I don't know if I can wait that long! haha.

So that's about it...still quite a few steps to go before we can actually say that the house is ours, but we're well on our way, and I can't believe that we might actually be homeowners before the age of 30!

I'll be sure to update again with the results (after this crazy 2 weeks is up most likely). If you could, cross your fingers and send good house vibes our way, we could use them!

Be back soon with some photos of my new hair (see, all kinds of stuff going on around here! haha)

G.

Thoughts on this whole photography thing [LONG]

I've been meaning to write this post for a long time now, but I haven't had the time and brain function to articulate what I want to say (not quite sure I do at the moment either, but I thought I would try, on this rainy, rainy June day). I'm hoping to be completely honest about the whole thing, but I may gloss over some details or whatever for my own well-being (and perhaps to spare some feelings)...we'll see. I'm typing without a plan, basically.

First, a bit of background for those who may not know: Last year while I was on Mat Leave I bought a new camera and started taking photos of my friend's kids. I posted them on my personal Facebook, and for some reason (probably semi-purposefully, looking back on it), I included a watermark that said "Genevieve Flynn Photography". Long before I was on Mat Leave I had this vague dream that someday, maybe, I would get to do photography as a career (because I loved it so much). so that's probably the reason I took the 'leap' and included my name on those photos. Well it seemed to have worked, because I started getting requests from more friends and family, and friends of friends, and eventually strangers, to take photos of them and their kids. I was delighted, and jumped into the 'portfolio' building portion of my job (meaning I was charging near nothing and working my butt off). Luckily I was able to do it because Victor was still small and Dan was home for a lot of it. I shot about 30-35 sessions in 2010 and was extremely encouraged.

Around the Fall I started to seriously think about what I would do once my Maternity Leave ended at the end of February. Of course the idea of staying home and doing photography was at the top of my list, so I started researching ways I could do it. My father in law recommended a federal government initiative called the Self Employment Benefit Program (SEB). Basically it was a program designed to help you get through your first year of owning your own business by providing EI payments while you worked. The payments were small (less than minimum wage), but it was meant to act as a supplement so that you could take a stab at working for yourself. It sounded perfect for me so starting at the beginning of this year, I worked on my application and business plan.

Now, before that (still in the Fall), I also started a Fan page on Facebook and a Blogger blog. I bought a professional blog template and worked on it for months, but couldn't 'reveal' it until I knew I was in the SEB program (one of the conditions of the program is that you couldn't be already 'working' at your job, so I had to keep things somewhat under wraps). The dream was slowly becoming a reality.

Then, around February, about a week before I had to send in my application, I saw that positive sign on the pregnancy test. To say I was freaked out and discouraged was an understatement. I saw all my hard work and possibilities fly out the window. Once the initial shock wore off though, we decided not to let the baby ‘get in our way’ of our original plans, so I applied for the SEB program anyway, knowing full well that I may have to quit early to raise the baby in the Fall.

The rest happened fairly quickly; the application/business plan was reviewed, approved, I sent in a few papers, registered my business name, arranged a sitter for Victor, and by mid-March I was ‘officially’ working for myself (and getting paid, too)!

So that’s how it happened, and here I am now, about 3 months in. And so far? It’s been equally awesome and discouraging.

Awesome for obvious reasons; my schedule is incredibly flexible, which means I can still live my life and not have to plan too far ahead and can take life as it comes (important when you have a little one!) The only obligation I have under the SEB is that I need to work 35 hours a week, but those hours can be at any time, so sometimes I work after Victor has gone to bed, or on the weekends. My ‘work’ is also flexible (for example last week I went location scouting with Dan and Victor on a Saturday afternoon, and it really didn’t seem like ‘work’ at all). I LOVE having the flexibility to do what I want, break when I want, work hard when I want and generally be my own ‘boss’. If Victor is sick I can take the day off, or if I have appointments I don’t have to rush through them to get back to the office, the work-life balance is just where I want it to be.

Of course it’s also awesome because I get to do what I love to do, which is to take photos of people. Despite being generally introverted, I always enjoy talking with clients and getting to know them during and after the session (after the initial jitters wear off). I love the blogging, the organization, the inspiration, the editing (well, maybe not so much the editing, haha), the shooting, and just generally being allowed to be creative.

I’ve also made a great ally and friend through all this, and for that I’m very thankful. We’re both throwing our hats into this photography business world together, and it has been so nice having someone to bounce ideas off with, talk and vent to, and just having someone who ‘gets it’.

Now of course, it hasn’t been perfect. Things have been quite a bit slower than I originally thought (and would like them to be). After much debate and struggle, I recently raised my prices to what I felt I needed to survive (and what I felt I was worth), and the response has been mixed (not surprising considering just last year I was shooting and burning for pennies). That of course makes me doubt my self-worth and just how viable having this business will be in the future. While the SEB payments are extremely helpful (in that they are acting as my sole income while any profit money is going back into the business), we’re just getting by as it stands now and sometimes I feel like I’m not contributing enough to the family and towards our dreams (owning a house, for example). I worry all the time if I chose the wrong market (Sussex is a small, lower class town, and professional photography probably isn’t at the top of everyone’s priority list), if I’m being foolish for thinking I can charge more when there are tons of shoot and burners out there (some of them who’s work I feel is less good than mine, yet are rolling in sessions…extremely frustrating), if there’s too much competition, and recently, if my work is just not good enough. I’m full of self doubt and I really don’t enjoy it (I was quite confident in my abilities at my last job, so this is new for me). I’m trying not to pay attention to what others are doing around me, but it’s hard sometimes. I’m proud that I have taken a few ‘risks’ (my one little word for 2011) so far, but the fear of failure is still always right there in my mind.

While I do enjoy working for myself, I often find myself lacking motivation, and will admit to piddling away more ‘work’ time than I’d like to confess (Facebook is evil I tell you!) It’s easy to justify all the online things I do as ‘work’, but really, I need to be more disciplined. Instead of scanning Pinterest for images, I should be out practicing my craft; instead of checking and updating my Facebook several times a day, I should be out meeting people, handing out business cards and finding ways to promote myself. I know all this and yet I sit here, in front of my computer, and passively wait for work to come to me. It’s very hard for me to ‘sell’ myself, so this aspect of owning my own business is definitely the hardest for me. I still kind of stutter when people ask me what I do and I say “photographer”.

Sadly, since photography became my ‘job’, I also take less photos than I used to at home (with the exception of my cell phone). I know this is pretty typical for photographers, but I wish I could get that spark back that I once had for photography, and not let it get bogged down by all the ‘business’ stuff (I read somewhere that owning your own photography business is 90% business, and 10% photography, and I totally agree!) I think that having more sessions would help ‘get the ball rolling’, but I shouldn’t wait around for that to happen, I should get out there and shoot, because once I actually start, I LOVE it. It’s just starting that’s so hard.

I know it’s still really early in the game, only being 3 months in (and really only have about a month of decent shooting weather, if that!), so the fact that I’m not swimming in work shouldn’t be an indication of how things will go in the long run. It takes years to establish a business and brand name, so I know I have a long way to go, I just hope that I can find the courage to not quit and go the safe route of a steady income, less responsibility, and job stability.

And that I can figure out a way to work with a newborn, but that’s another story :S

If you made it to the end of this, bravo! Thank you for letting me spill my mind through the keyboard and the interwebs.

Be back soon with a much fluffier post, about hair! (I have an appointment for Friday, I’m going red! And getting bangs! Oh my!)

Until then,
G.

PS-Are there any other ‘working at home mamas’ out there? Do you have some of the same self doubt issues that I have? Do you love working from home or are there downsides too?

SHAMELESS PLUGGING:
My Photography Website
My Photography Blog
My Facebook Fan Page (come 'like' me!)