Every once in awhile it'll hit me exactly where I am in my life and more importantly, where I WANT TO GO with my life. Not to say that my life isn't good right now, because it is good, I realize it more and more as time goes by, despite some little challenges along the way. It's hard sometimes though because I seem to want very different, (even polar opposite) things for myself and my life, but want them at the same time, like
...I want to live in the city in a cool loft,
...but I want to be in the country in a big house
...I want to have kids,
...but I want to have a great career and be a cool social girl
...I want to stay home,
...but I want to travel the world (and even live in another country)
...I want to live a simple, 1900s country life,
...but I want to be constantly online
...I want to stay in the background,
...but I want to put myself out there
...I want to be practical and realistic,
...but I want to follow my silly dreams
I guess the key to it all is to have balance. I can have both things at the same time, maybe just not exactly how I pictured it, maybe some compromises would have to be made. Basically I just have to really search inside myself to find out what I REALLY want, and to not be afraid to go for it and to not wonder whether I made the right decision. I see so many people online who are following their dreams and I must say I envy them, a) they aren't afraid of people knowing their dreams for fear of judgement for having them, b) because they are following their dreams and c) because they HAVE dreams that are clearly laid out for them, while I feel like my dreams are still in a fog and I have to find them among my day to day stresses and life. But I'm 25, and I'm learning. Hopefully I'll get there one day.
Heather and I are working tonight on our super fun project, I'm hoping to be able to post more on it next week, let's just say I'm dipping my toe in the water to see how it is, and I'm hoping it goes well...
I got the Christmas issue of Martha Stewart magazine (that's right, I'm not ashamed!), and there are so many fun little projects/recipes I want to try. Her Christmas editions are always so nostalgic and traditional and old fashioned, I love it. Heather and I have our Christmas events calendar all planned out, i think I might have to add some craft nights/baking nights to the mix :)
Well that's all, sorry for the ramblingness, I am trying to write when the urge hits me, so many times I think things in my head and wish I had written them down at that very moment, because the emotions were real and raw and genuine, as opposed to trying to re-create it later on. So I'm working on it.
Happy Mid-Week, sorry for the lack of photos! Gotta pick up that camera again...