Tuesday, December 22, 2009

Random thoughts on this whole baby thing [@ 29 Weeks]

Here we go, another batch of random thoughts from an increasingly large pregnant lady:

*Now that I'm in my 3rd trimester, the energy levels are definitely coming down a bit and it's kind of disappointing me since I still have so much to do! The past week I've been feeling quite tired and drained, the extra weight/difficulty in movement is certainly contributing to it I think, which is normal, but still, it was fun to feel like my old self for awhile. Also starting to wake up at night a couple of times due to having to pee/leg cramps, so that's adding to tiredness too. I will never be rested again! haha.

*I have no clothes. Yet again.

*I'm trying really hard not to let all the doctor and medical stuff bother or worry me too much. So far a lot has been thrown at me (all the tests and appointments and worries about my heart/the cord/my cervix/the baby's growth/early labour/my sugar levels, giving me steroids and pushing beta blockers, etc, etc), but until I actually feel that something is wrong with either me or the baby, I'm not going to let it get to me. I feel healthy, I feel like the baby is healthy so that's how I'm going about the next 11 weeks, assuming everything is ok. Now, I'm being watched/looked after quite carefully and for that I'm very thankful (if a bit annoyed at all the time it's taking), but I don't want to let it consume my thoughts, I'd rather just enjoy the time I have with him and Dan now worry-free.

*I've gone for 3 ultrasounds so far (with another coming next week) and they are always great fun, the last time we got a good look at his lips and face...it's a little person in there, that's what I'm realizing the most now. No more alien baby, no more weird concept, but a real, adorable little guy who's part me and part Dan, and I'm getting more and more anxious to meet him :)

*My favourite part of this whole thing so far has been feeling him move. It's definitely more distinct now and I can almost tell what he's doing in there. In the past couple of weeks the kicks have become almost more of a dragging motion, like he's rolling over instead of just jerking around, and it tickles, oddly. I can't complain about him hurting my ribs yet, but I'm sure it'll come in the next 11 weeks or so. The feet are definitely higher up in my abdomen though, and sometimes I can pinch my skin a little and feel the outline of his little foot (or what I think is his foot anyway.) So cool. I'm still very much mesmerized by my belly.

*We STILL don't have all the things we need for him (like a crib or car seat), but we did get a stroller so I feel like we're getting there, slowly but surely. Our moving plans are just a teeny bit more definite (we've decided on a date at least), but everything else is still so up in the air that I don't feel like we can properly plan or purchase anything before we know more (which we should hopefully next month.) I think that once Christmas is over and things settle down a bit more, I'll be able to focus and go out for a few big shopping trips to pick up the things I need (I read something today about needing little baby washcloths and nail clippers, I didn't even think of that!)

*One of the best things we found out recently is that I can have a natural birth, which is great news. I won't lie and and say that I'm not nervous or a bit scared about labour though, for the longest time I had it in my head that I was getting a 'cop out' by being forced into a c-section, but now that I have to actually address the fact that I'm going to be giving birth naturally, there's lots to think about and consider. Dan and I have talked about it some already, and I'll probably develop a birth plan over the next few months, but I think that at this point it's still too much of a far-away concept for me to really deal with (and I'll probably continue saying that up until the moment it happens, ha!) I am excited about it though.

*The closer I'm getting to leaving work the guiltier I'm feeling about it. I don't want to start doubting our decision to move, but the people here are so great and my job has changed so much (for the better) over the last 6 months or so that it's really making me sad that I have to leave it. I know moving home is going to be great in so many ways (being close to our family, living in the same town as one of my best friends, having our kids grow up together, getting a house, living in the country, hopefully being able to stay home with the baby), but there are definitely things that I will miss about our life now.

*We're about 90% decided on the name, I've even addressed him as such a couple of times to try and get used to it...I think that whatever name we choose will sound weird until I actually see him, then hopefully the name will fit. I'm almost committed enough to buy one of these custom prints for the nursery, but I think I might hold off just a bit longer.

PS-It's not Maxwell.

Well that's enough for now, I still have 2 (possibly 3 if I do one 4 weeks after birth, which might be fun) v-logs left to do and 5 more Belly shots, time is flying! I'm really looking forward to the next few months though and to finally meeting my son.

Until next time, the thoughts keep piling up...


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